Leaders Must Face Their Ineffective Behavior
Leaders and managers can quickly get into trouble when we stop serving and become self-serving.
One way that presents itself is when we have to face our ineffective behavior. When this occurs we tent to tell 1 of 3 types of stories:
1) Victim Stories (It's not my fault).
Even if most of it is not your fault, find that small percentage that is your fault. What could have you done differently? Why were your actions perceived that way. What should have done/not done? There is a big likelihood that you will face a similar situation as a leader and asking those questions will help you navigate better in the future.
2) Villain Stories (It's all your fault).
When someone has done wrong by you we often want to jump right to blaming the person. But what if it was not the person? What if it was the system? What if it was a combination of the person and the system. I have heard so many leaders say, "I can't believe he/she/they would do this to me/us." If there is a reoccurring trend with different people, there is a greater chance that you have a systems issue (or that the leader might be the issue) rather than others being the problem.
3) Helpless Stories (There was/is nothing else I could/can do).
When we tell an believe helpless stories we are doomed to suffer the same fate over and over again. Rarely are leaders only agents or only victims. When leaders give into helpless stories it often points to an unwillingness to consider that an opportunity for a better outcome was missed.
Healthy teams tell these types of stories less. If you want to be part of a healthy team, we at DC Leadership Training & Consulting want to help you develop that culture.